The Society and Lainey Gossip host Sixth Annual SMUT soiree at Evergreen Brickworks

“Y’know how you call a party with all guys a Sausage Fest?! Well, what do you call a party with all girls?”

There were a lot of naughty associations whipped up within the first ten minutes of entering the Evergreen Brick Works for the 6th Annual SMUT Soiree, but they aren’t classy, so we won’t go there. Presented by The Society and E-Talk’s Lainey Gossip, what seemed like one thousand well-groomed women showed up ready to get down and dirty and embrace the smutty world of celebrity gossip. Though SMUT was the moniker of the evening, the crowd was dressed to strut, vying for a ‘best dressed’ award, with a 2K spending spree at The Bay attached.

The Society’s Ashleigh Dempster & Amanda Blakley looked lovely and glowing with matching baby bumps, and sipped on The Society’s own branded version of Perrier bubbly. While those of us who could kick back a cocktail or two – imbibed Absolut’s newest concoction, Absolut Orient Apple – a veeeeery drinkable blend of red apple and ginger-infused vodka.

Before all the celebrity trash-talk started, we junked out on Caramilk bars, popcorn, and ice-cream, and became our own paparazzi in the Snapz photo booth. Making sure the beautiful crowd stayed put together, Rimmel London was on hand to touch up our faces. Our mascara’d eyes wandered up to the DJ booth, where dreamy Brendan Fallis spun top 40 hits off a playlist that sounded like it was straight outta spin class.

At 8:30, the crowd finally settled, and eager smuthounds quieted down for Lady Lainey and Co. We listened in for a little while, but our crew was having too much fun on our own. Personally, I felt a bit irked hearing stories about pregnancy tests (Neither funny or interesting. Maybe too private?!)

I guess that’s why they call it SMUT – talking celebrity gossip often leaves one feeling grimy. And to be totally honest, I’ve got better dirty stories of my own.

~ Louisa Cohen