Thank fuck summer is finally here. I’m enjoying taking off my clothes at any opportunity. From the moment I wake up and feel the morning dew between my toes, to when I watch the sun slowly set in the sky while listening to the sound of water sprinklers hissing on green fields, I am wet and ready to mount anything and everything, like my bicycle or your groin!
Even the fruits of the season elicit feelings of passion as I close my lips around a ripe strawberry or let sweet peach juice drip off my chin. If I have one mission this summer, it is to orgasm as much as possible—with a lover, with a stranger, or on my own.
Like the bucket lists I’d make as a child, where I’d tick off goals like going to Canada’s Wonderland or making a lemonade stand, I have a to-do list for this summer, and I’m feeling pretty excited about it:
- Go to a small-town drive-in. Do it in the back seat.
- Bring my Womanizer on a camping trip. Lie naked on a rock and give myself multiple orgasms. Following, howl at the moon (and hope that a bear doesn’t show up).
- Go raspberry picking without underwear. Feel the thrill each time I bend down to pluck the juicy berries.
- Hit up Oasis rooftop pool and be open to possibilities.
- Ride my bike as much as possible and be mindful of how it makes me feel between my legs. Ensure at least one evening is spent on a trail with a lover who ends up with his/her fingers on my clit. (If you will it, it will happen.)
- On a rainy afternoon, brew my favourite herbal tea, de-robe, stretch out in the bed sheets, read Anaïs Nin’s A Journal of Love, and listen to the pelts of rain pound down on the roof. When inclined, reach for my favourite toy in the bedside drawer.
- Prepare the perfect picnic basket, call someone I’ve been thinking about, meet them under a tree for an afternoon, and allot a minimum of three hours for smooching, cherry eating, rolling around, sneaky touching, and massaging.
- Go to Canada’s Wonderland, but do it differently than in years past. Here’s a favourite Reese Witherspoon clip for inspo.
- Night swimming. Is anything sexier? This one is a must.
- Play Scrabble by candlelight. On a balcony, in a park, deep in a field, or on a blanket in a yard. Words can arouse, and there’s something so special about sticky summer nights when a sundress or T-shirt is the only layer you need.
- When I was younger, I used to leave my office tower in Toronto’s financial district to call my boyfriend from a Front Street payphone and get him off with language. I should do this again, and with my voice. Texting is too easy. I want a challenge.
- A hotel lobby is a wonderful setting for role-play. Pick a fancy one and meet someone there who’s got a wild imagination and some guts. Start a conversation as if we’ve just met, like we’re strangers from different cities. (For the extra bold and daring, attempt this with a real stranger.) Following, ride up the elevator with an open agenda. There are some lovely rooftops in Toronto hotels that have a gorgeous summer night sky view.
- Like a luxury five-star hotel, there is equal allure to be found in a roadside motel. Take a spontaneous road trip to a small town in Ontario. Fill an evening with exhilarating oral sex, and wear that messy bedhead with pride while rolling into a local diner for a greasy breakfast the next morning. A most satisfying excursion indeed. (Extra points for dipping into a lake on the way home.)
- Go on a hike. Bring ropes.
- Hit a sweaty dance floor on a Saturday night and find someone to grind with. This is a surefire way to get those endorphins pumping!
- Ride the ferris wheel at a small-town fair. Share cotton candy with someone who makes you laugh, and walk to the nearest 24-hour laundromat to make out on a rumbling dryer.
- Lie on a dock and get spanked/spank another. Following, submerge ass in cool lake. End evening with a campfire and your libation of choice.
- Masturbate minutes before attending one of the many outdoor film screenings in Toronto. Arrive feeling relaxed, confident, and with a popsicle to lick while spread out on grass. I love turning myself on, just with myself. Inevitably arrive with a softened sway to my step.
If I can check off half of these, my summer is sure to be a delicious one. Who wants to play?