You’re a Grown-Ass Woman, so you have heard of Lena Dunham. JK, it doesn’t matter if you’re a Grown-Ass Woman or not; everyone and their Grown-Ass Grandmother has heard about Lena Dunham because she is Queen of TV, and fair enough. She has a great show that people are talking about, a lot. They are also talking about her. They are talking about her writing, her friends, her $3M book deal, her mother, her body (forever and unendingly), her tattoos, her upbringing, and her role in society. Everyone is just sitting there illegally streaming HBO and thinking, “I feel like I have THE opinion on Lena Dunham of my generation. Or at least, AN opinion on Lena Dunham of A generation,” you know what I mean? Anyway, here are some things about her.

“Do you know who you remind me of…?”
Is it Hannah? From GIRLS? Is it?! F to the YI, friends, acquaintances, and well-meaning older ladies from workplaces the world over, there are millions of young women who work as writers, and who have had dating mishaps, or an STI, or wore a bad outfit one time, or have a regular-sized butt and thighs. That’s sort of the whole point of the character: that she embodies a lot of traits that “millennials” (barf) can relate to. I am also going to suggest it is medium-rude to compare someone you don’t know very well to one of the least inherently likeable characters in contemporary television. Plus: “I play these girls who are close to me, but they’re the parts of me that I find the most shameful, or the parts of me that I kind of want to excise.” – Lena Dunham on Hannah. So.

“We <3 mistakes!” – pop culture
TV is all about making mistakes these days! And so is the internet. And all the articles. It’s true, we all mess up all the time; but is it so wrong to occasionally want to see some well-planned personal victories on TV? Would it be so boring to have Jessa start an internship and discover she loves the publishing industry? Could my girl LD not write in a few successes or crises averted, even? No one is a mess all the time. GIRLS is a fairly accurate representation of all the shit parts of being a “20-something” “nowadays,” but what about the good parts? Show some of the good parts, plz, TV and movies. They are out there and they can be just as narratively interesting as the failures.

Shut your face about her body right this instant, duh…
So I don’t care if you are Drake or Slate or the Huffington Post or a guy on a night bus who for some reason thinks I want this information, but I would like everyone to take their negative opinions about Lena Dunham’s extremely important and progressive and occasionally non-sexual but also sometimes highly sexual, deeply feminist nudity to the Graveyard of Unnecessary Opinions, right beside your elderly uncle’s stance on abortion or your creepy coworker’s thoughts on how your shirts fit. (“Well!” – that coworker.) Thank you for your co-operation, and RIP your rude comment about her butt.

…Unless you’re gonna talk about how great it is, in which case join the party
Lena’s perky little breasts have become important to me the way my childhood cat was/is important to me. I LOVE them. They are so cute and also somehow comforting. I feel like her chest and I are best friends. When she did this, I wanted to high-five them. There is no dearth of positive chat RE: Lena’s lady lumps online, but people keep framing it under this discussion of “what she’s doing” by baring all. I’d love it if she didn’t have to be “doing” anything with it. Is the cast of Game of Thrones “doing” anything aside from getting their medieval ladies out?

People be givin’ Lena shit because you know why? Patriarchy is why.
Men of all ages and backgrounds have had semi-autobiographical TV shows, or been producers, writers, and directors of things they have starred in. Do they get bothered about their legs or their point of view or the tone of their show? Are they constantly being dissected physically, mentally, and creatively by all the magazines and websites, all the time? Nope. And you know why? It’s 2013 and mainstream society is still kind of freaked out by a woman who is both empowered and powerful enough to express herself exactly how she wants. YIKES.

Should we collaborate Y/N/Y
Lena, Judd, if you are reading this, I have a rock-solid pilot in the works about some friends who run a women’s website and one of them writes a column about her current girlcrush Lena Dunham and then all of a sudden Lena is also contributing to the website and everyone is drinking fancy whiskey-based drinks and wearing interesting shoes and telling secrets ALL THE TIME. So, think about that. Should be pretty alright. Totally fictional, of course. (Lena, holler at me.)

So, my secret dream is to have the comments section of these articles be a place where actual comments and discussions happen, and now I am going to try to force it: what would your GIRLS-type show be about? Obviously you cannot take the plot of smash-hit Bloggin’ with Lena, currently in pre-pre-production, but I’m sure there are elements of your own lives that would also make stellar TV. Talk to me about it? (I need this.)

Follow Monica on Twitter: @monicaheisey