I have blonde hair and am 5ft10, but I’ve always found that the men I’ve dated have a serious hard on for petite brunettes with tattoos. At a crowded bar I’ve watched them with utter jealousy as their jaw drops when some Tegan and Sara look alike passes by carrying a tray full of drinks, arms flexed, tattoo sleeve covering their miniature limbs. I then start to rage with envy and on occassion, with a few glasses of wine, this will turn into irrational messy fights. I admit, at times I’ve even died my hair dark brown, and sported a ripped up black leather jacket – trying to alter my look to fit their porn dreams. At the end of the day, it’s me that they are with and want to be with but at times it can be confusing.
So here’s my question this week for the men:
Do you have a physical body type or look that you go after? (petite, long legs, red head, big boobs) How would you describe it, and how important is it to you in choosing a significant other?
Al Batrosse:
I start with what attracts me when women are wearing clothes and first and foremost I think a private smile is the big attractor.
Boobs, however are my kryptonite. I hate that I have to remind myself of "the three second rule" so much in the summertime. I am so physically attracted to boobs that it bugs me. A friend interrupted me at a party recently, I was pretending to seduce a colleague by quoting poetry. He chortled and said, "I think what he is trying to say is that if Yeats was still alive, he would have written a poem about your tits."
Having revealed all of this I honestly do not care what body type a person is, I have dated women with all kinds of attributes. To go back to what I started with, it is a great smile that is going to win me over.
Vincent Darkbloom:
I agree with Allan — a nice smile is a big hook. In our body-obsessed culture, I’m surprised by how often the face is overlooked, both by the culture at large and by hormonal men who seem to care only about modelesque physiques. On a superficial level, facial beauty is more important to me than the body–and on a slightly less superficial level, the face connotes more about one’s personality than the body does, at least (namely in the smile and overall cast of the mouth and the eyes). However, I do favor more voluptuous bodies than rail-thin ones; I’ll take someone ten pounds overweight than under any day, and prefer Anna Nicole Smith (alive, and in her prime) to Nicole Richie by a long shot. That said, I also like it most when there’s a sense that the voluptuousness stems from athleticism, not mere lassitude. Nevertheless, the face trumps all else, and how attracted I am to a woman’s body has as much to do with how attracted I am to her face and her personality (hopefully not necessarily in that order).
Bob Smith
I feel a certain urge to go PC here. Karma has a way of coming back around and considering I haven’t lifted a weight since raves were cool and my diet consists of cigarettes, beer and cheeseburgers I really shouldn’t be judging anyone’s physique…What? Really? With the glow sticks, techno and ecstasy? No shit….Anyways, I agree with the other guys that a cute face is paramount but I think it’s kind of funny that a girl will think you’re "sweet" or that "eyes and smile" is considered a polite answer to the "what do you find most attractive about a girl" question. Isn’t that the aspect of a girl’s appearance she has the least control over? Despite what Revlon and Maybeline may have to say, there’s not a whole lot one can do to fix ugly. Short of drastic plastic surgery, you’re stuck with crossed eyes, low cheekbones, a sloping forehead or whatever. I recognize that some women (and guys too) that are overweight have glandular conditions or slow metabolisms but for most people going for a run and the occasional salad works wonders so focusing on someone’s face just seems sort of cruel, right?
I suppose if you were to pin me down on the question I tend to gravitate toward slender brunettes but generally "pretty" gets the conversation started and after enough beer "female" will do. As I duck lightning bolts and look three ways before entering traffic I feel the need to throw a bone to the tiny-titted and say that I’m not so into big boobs. I just end up batting them around like a curious puppy for a minute or so and get bored.
So in conclusion, although her long legs, or her perky breasts may make him drool – it is the smile, bright eyes and personality that will win you over – or alternatively lots and lots of beer. Ahh – thanks guys, we feel the same way.