Dear MJ, 

 

I think I have a problem. I love my boyfriend, he’s great in bed and knows all the things to say. He’s a dirty talker and really knows how to turn me on. He loves when I talk about how big his penis is and how it makes me sore in the morning. He loves to play with himself & has his hand on his dick all the time.  

I was recently at his house and I thought that I would clean up his place while he was out golfing with his hockey buddies. As I was straightening up his DVDs, I saw one titled “Rookie Party 1997”. I was curious so I put it on and it was a gay porn! Then I went through all his stuff and found 2 gay porno mags. 

Now I am totally freaked out!  I am starting to wonder if my boyfriend is gay, and all these guy’s trips to the cottage, football games, golfing weekends are nothing but a big gay fuck fest. My boyfriend is a serious jock and as straight-seeming as they come so how could he be gay? 

I don’t know how to approach this.  Am I over reacting or have I stumbled on to something that requires my immediate exit? Is my boyfriend gay?? 

 

Signed,

Rookie Party From Hell

Dear Rookie Party,

I don’t think you have a problem, I know you have a problem. Unfortunately, I don’t feel suitably equipped to answer the question about whether or not your boyfriend is gay, so I decided to consult my best gay friend:

Me: What would you say to a girl who found gay porn in her boyfriend’s apartment?

BGF: I’d say, who has the porn and when can I meet him?

Me: He’s a reader’s boyfriend- and you can’t meet him. Is he gay?

BGF: I’ve had ‘straight’ guys watch gay porn with me and they get fascinated (= turned on) but still maintain that they’re ‘straight’. The guy is probably bi, or at least bi-curious.  Not a great prospect for a girl if her boyfriend is curious about cock though as most of the curious ones experiment, if you know what I mean…”

And I do know what he means because on a weekly basis my darling friend tells me stories about “straight” guys who want to come over and watch porn or need a backrub or think it would be fun to jerk off beside each other…

Here’s a story for you: A friend of mine dated a “serious jock” for 10 years. He was super macho, always getting into fights, played sports, loved strippers- you know the type. Anyway, first she got genital warts from him, then she got Chlamydia and then one day she got into his voicemail and heard a message from his gay lover “Mark” who had left a very graphic message about their previous night together. Then she got smart and got rid of him and is now happily married with 3 lovely children.

This is not to say that your boyfriend is gay or bi-sexual. And if he is, it doesn’t make him a bad guy. It just makes him not for you if you’re looking to be with somebody who is truly STRAIGHT. There could be a very reasonable explanation for all of this… He’s an actor and was doing research for a part perhaps? Either way, you need to get to the bottom of this one ASAP.

What I really want to know is: why haven’t you asked your boyfriend about this if you’re so upset about it? Could it be that you’re afraid of the answer..? Good luck, my friend.

Yours in hot steamy summer love,

MJ