Wooohoooo! We may not be the biggest hockey aficionados around (please don’t ask me to name a single Leaf) but when we see our girls win, we can’t help but freak out. Yes, you have given us an overwhelming sense of pride and we think Hockey Canada is being a big wank about popping champagne on the ice. Maybe I should tell them about the time the Edmonton Oilers asked me about my pubic hair, now that was something that deserves scolding.
Our Canadian hockey gals capped off their impressive Olympic run with yet another gold last night after giving up only two goals during the entire competition—all while completing a secret operation on the side. Hockey stars AND secret agents? Now that’s something to brag about!
Similar to the Bourne Identity, our hockey women also know how to sleuth around and Operation Aquarium had others believe they were kissing dolphins when instead they were slamming up against the boards, practicing their game with a local Vancouver team. They would tell people they were going to the “aquarium” and then race off to their secret hockey game. No one caught on.
After their secret games were over, it was time for the women to take on the U.S. for gold—the only team that posed any real threat. Beating them 2-0, Goaltender Shannon Szabados made an impressive 28 saves while teenage sensation Marie-Philip Poulin scored both goals, netting the team their third straight Olympic gold medal.
So for a tournament that saw you dominating the competition and pulling of successful secret missions, we salute you Canadian women’s hockey team. Congratulations on staying golden, we knew you could do it.