by Annie Webber

“I think your sister’s been shooting up again.” My face goes pink as my mom breaches this highly inappropriate and extremely unlikely subject to come up in my suburban kitchen. During the holidays. Come on, Mom. Regardless, I head down the stairs, giving my brain a swift kick into “Older-sister-saves-baby-sister’s-life” mode. She’s sitting on the couch, all roses and sweetness, with her sleeve rolled up over a telltale bruise. Holy shit. She looks up at me with a terrified expression on her face. “What??” she demands. “Uhh, ummm, ehhhn…” I stammer, bumbling my way into saving her life just as my mother’s peals of laughter ring down the staircase. “Oh,” she says. “Mom told you I’m shooting up. I donated blood today, you doink!!”

And there you have it ladies and gentlemen. The birth of stylishness cannot be pinned down to any one situation. So next time you’re flailing your arms over your head, “feeling the music” or lounging ‘round the home in something sans-sleeves, let your ego swell with pride along with your blood vessels. Because something new is cropping up in the crooks of elbows all over the city – blood clinics rejoice, it’s the most buzzed-about bruising in the business – donation wounds!! Get stuck for a good cause, and revel in the myriad concerned looks you’re bound to receive. Nicer than vampires, healthier than druglords, your nearest donor clinic nurse is your new style enabler.