Bar & Night Profiler

GOING ON A MAN HUNT

Fri, 15 Aug 2008 15:38:16 -0700

Many of my girlfriends are recently single, which has lead to several conversations concerning where to find a cute distraction in this city; and in this case I’m referring to bars, as opposed to The Healthy Butcher or Long & McQuade’s.

Chronologic @ THE BOAT

Jen — Tue, 22 Jul 2008 10:10:23 -0700

by Jen McNeely
Upon hearing about the night CHRONOLOGIC at The Boat, a night of music starting from the 1940’s and jumping through every fun song in the soda pop 50’s, psychedelic 60’s, disco 80’s, cocaine confident 80’s, hip hop 90’s and finally to our current slosh of electro mash…I was instantaneously sold

However, this excitement crashed when I walked up the stairs of the semi run down establishment in Kensington and with one quick scan of the room, came to the conclusion that I would likely prefer to share drinks with the forty something dad like door guy versus the 20 year old toting a broken straw hat appearing to be drunk for the sixth time in his life. Sigh. It’s difficult to find fun dance nights in this city that fit somewhere between bankers at Cheval and 21 year old hipsters in clashing costumes.

Stewed, Screwed and Tattooed

Sass — Wed, 16 Jul 2008 11:06:31 -0700

Sailor Jerry Spiced Rum Launch Party

by Sass
Sailor Jerry? Ahoy! Rum? Oh boy! Sailor Jerry Rum? Enjoy!

Hello Ontario-ians you've got a new elixir to mix wit'cher cola. The " 92 proof " spiced navy rum named after the legendary tattoo artist, Norman "Sailor Jerry" Collins, launched it's inception to an LCBO shelf near you at Tattoo Rock Parlour, care of Jesson Artmont Communications.

ZIZEK

Jen — Fri, 11 Jul 2008 12:21:42 -0700

Buenos Aires Cumbia heats up Toronto

Originally it started as Columbian folk music but contemporary cumbia involves instrumental mixing, lots of strong drum beats and overall the type of music you think of when imagining a late night street party in a hot Latin American city. Tears of sweat beading down bust lines, skirts getting lifted and tossed, tequila flowing and rough sex amongst jungle snakes and vibrant wildlife.
Zizek has taken the forceful percussion of cumbia and scritched and scratched / mished and mashed to achieve a wholly unique sound that incorporates crunk, electro, dancehall and hip hop.
Tracks that pair the likes of Puerto Rica's Calle 13 blended with global muse MIA - result in an internationally explosive sound. Lively, provocative the DJ troupe Zizek offers up beats that are invigorating to the soul and bring the kind of excitement that equates to hooking up for a one night stand while on vacay far away from home.

Rum Magic on the Island

Jen — Wed, 2 Jul 2008 14:13:27 -0700

by Jen
The week is done, now take me to the island and gimme some rum!

ROCKSTAR HOTEL

Sass — Thu, 19 Jun 2008 12:57:05 -0700

Pre-MMVA Party @ Gladstone Hotel

by Sass Zucket

I gave up a night of gushing over guitar babes at North by Northeast to attend THE hottest ticket in town on Saturday night; the exclusive invite-only pre-MMVA party at the Gladstone Hotel hosted by District Lifestyle Marketing in conjunction with Pink Mafia.

Evidently, I was invite-worthy. OK, so maybe I was there under El Presidente's decree and when she mentioned I could go, I yelped YES! YES! YES! Oh gee lucky me! and choked on my own fame-gluttonous salivation at the opportunity. Charlie and his chocolate factory ain't got nuttin' on the golden ticket to Rockstar Hotel. I mean who wouldn't forgo fawning over dirty rockstar wannabes at NXNE to legitimately party like a rock, party like a rockstar?

Hey Ms. SheJay Put a Record on, I Wanna Dance With My Baby…

Robyn Sprott — Wed, 18 Jun 2008 10:40:05 -0700

Pink Mafia Presents: GET ER DONE

W/ DJs: Betti Forde, Bitchin', Fierce Helder, The Royal Society & Barbi

By Robyn Sprott

Angelic, chastity, submissive, devout, obedient, and domestic… the unblemished conventional attributes prescribed to the embodiment of womanhood. ENOUGH OF THIS JUNE CLEAVER SHIT! Who wants to follow her feeble and pathetic example of altruistic behaviour anyways?! I’d rather be a Rude Gurl Selectah and Get ‘Er Done!

'Politics of Puberty' party at Whippersnapper gallery.

Sass — Wed, 11 Jun 2008 14:44:04 -0700

By: Sass Zucket

Remember how horny you were as a teen?

A babe served me this line as a sell to go out on a date with him to the Whippersnapper gallery's dance party, kicking off the 'Politics of Puberty' show. I obliged, because Jen had included this in her Weekend Ideas newsletter, and he was a good kisser. If I'm going to take a trek down teenage memory lane, there better be some making out involved. To answer the headlining question, I do remember how horny I was as a teen. My sexual desire hasn't changed much, seeing as my teenage years were not so long ago. This was probably true of all the attendees. If anything, most of us are more horny now, y'know, having actually had sex. The Whippersnapper gallery is a not-for-profit space for youth artists. For the event, the space took on an

Last Night A DJ Saved My Life

Mon, 26 May 2008 14:05:51 -0700

by Teresa Grimbos

Judy Bloom references always make me feel warm and fuzzy inside. After all, Ms. Bloom had a lot to do with my preteen popularity status when she imparted her wisdom on me to repeatedly chant “I must I must I must increase my bust”, placing me at the very top of my prepubescent male counterparts’ “best boobs” list.

And so yes—I judged a dance party by its flyer. Are you there God, it’s me-Dance Party happened at Tiger Bar—a cavernous little hole somewhat redeemed by amazon-themed wallpaper, but not so much by an awful locker room stench and unusually high temperature noticeable immediately upon entry into the bar. But, an uncomfortable setting didn’t matter for the true dance lovers who were feeling the music. The checkerboard dance floor was soon obscured by gyrating hips, flailing arms and, if you listened closely, you could hear a sing along or two (think koom-ba-ya with an electro pop back beat).

You Gotta Give In to Peer Pressure Every Now and Then

Robyn Sprott — Thu, 22 May 2008 11:23:18 -0700

The Montreal Crew Brings it to Toronto every first Saturday @ The Drake

By Robyn Sprott

There is a man from Montreal who has the softest, most velveteen-like skin in all the land. While this fact alone is astonishing, it doesn’t stop there. Legend has it he throws the raddest parties where all the top-shelf tastemakers rejoice in a fiesta on the dance floor and “bare gines” and “33 cent a minute pay-as-you go kinda gals” (cell phone speaking, you pervo) come alive. This man with freakishly velvety soft skin and current cock of the walk roosting on the partying throne goes by the name of Sir D.L. Jones, and he is one of the individuals responsible for Peer Pressure.

Your mother was probably right when she told you to stay away from “those kids.” You know the ones. The ones that take risks, binge drink, and indulge in recreational drug use all in the name of Peer Pressure. Well its time you tell your mother to shut the e’ff up and give in to Peer Pressure!