For a cheap but steamy Valentine’s Day, we recommend renting one of the following films, cracking open a warm bottle of red, slipping into some sexy undies, lighting some candles…you’ll figure out the rest.

A Summer in La Goulette
An endearing foreign flick about three young girls out to lose their virginity in a small town in Morocco. Further to a sexy summer quest, a lot of humour and endearing family dynamics spawn from their cherry popping plan.

The Swimming Pool
A mystery writer takes to the South of France, in hopes of finding peace and inspiration for her new novel. Dwelling at the summer home of her publisher, the serene setting is interrupted when sexually charged hot young temptress enters the scene and adds fire and drama that stirs a web of passionate crime. The slow pan of a white bathing suit should spring a fast and hard erection.

Last Tango in Paris
A young Parisian woman about to get married has a sensual affair with an American widow. Butter becomes lubricant in a semi-violent, but erotic, sex act on carpet. Shadows, harmonica, Parisian architecture, baths and a healthy bosom caressed by strong hairy arms. For any of you who have ever wanted to seduce an older man.

Unfaithful
Diane Lane falls into a steamy affair with a younger man. Although this story line of infidelity will make your skin sweat and crawl, one can’t help but be extraordinarily aroused by the hot sex on the other side of town. Overwhelmed with emotions, Lane is pushed and pulled in and out of her double life and devastating consequences prevail. Rough stairwell sex will entice you to wander from the bed and do it on the bathroom floor.

Secretary
Depressed Lee Holloway (Maggie Gylenhall) moves from the mental ward to the secretary desk for stern lawyer, Mr. Grey (James Spader). Re-typing letter after letter becomes a sexual sadomasochistic act which escalates to spanking, crawling and ropes. For anyone who enjoys a master and slave dynamic – this is that in a liquid form. Drink up slut.

Stealing Beauty
Tuscany, Portishead, swimming holes, wine, masturbating, the hunger to lose one’s virginity, paint, Liv Tyler’s voluptuous tits, campfire, vineyard…say those words and your panties will magically get damp. In high school we would rent this and discuss a plan to lose our virginity in a similarly romantic and perfect. (Totally didn’t happen)

Risky Business
Firstly, I want to bite teenage Tom Cruise’s cheeks when he slips across the hardwood with socks and tighty whities dancing to “I like that ol’ time rock n’ roll”. If I were in that room, I’d have flipped over a couch just to grab his ass. While watching Rebecca De Mornay and young Tom do it on the subway visions of sperm swimming fast emerge as we feel the vibrations of the tracks. You will want someone to rip off your panties and fill you up. Dirty like the TTC.

And God Created Woman
Bridget Bardot’s character in this 1956 classic is a woman with an unyielding sexual drive. She simply can’t help bedding the men around her and when the bongo’s start to play an out of control force take over and she succumbs to carnal desires which translate into fiery dancing in which she is forced to caress her bosom and shake her curves at an accelerated pace that leaves all men drooling on the sidelines. Lusty and busty.

The Cook, The Wife, His Wife and Her Lover
She may have played stiff Queen Elizabeth but in this meat lover’s erotica, Helen Mirren is anything but prudish. Mixing the sensuality of food, wine with sex and body parts – things get kinky in the meat freezer. If the chopping of a knife and sound of meat slabs hitting the cutting board turn you on, than take a bite out of this somewhat vulgar but titillating cinema. The garden of Eden on crack.

In The Name of The Rose
Horny celibate monks = secret cloak fucking under tables with peasants. I first saw this film as an impressionable young teen and the squeaky shrieks that immersed from the mute peasant girl were enough for me to rewind and play this scene a dozen times. The sex that you are not supposed to have is always the hottest. Although Christian Slater is anything but a sex symbol in this medieval story, it’s his uncontrollable hungers for pussy that make us want to shag an abbot.

Y tu Maman Tambien
The older I get, the more I fantasize about taking two young boys and wowing them with my sexual prowess. There would be no quivelling over how to do it, what to suck, push or rub. I would be in full control and push the boundaries over their expectations until our bodies were doused with cream and sweat. Although a sad story, one can not argue that the quick backseat romps and intoxicated cabana threesome are flooding with passion that automatically spreads the legs.

9½ Weeks
Wall street banker (Mickey Rourke) meets recently divorced Soho babe (Kim Basinger) and they take to kinky foreplay and unrestrained sex for 9 ½ weeks. She strips, he blindfolds her, they lick ice, each other and the chemistry is wild.

Lie With Me
Canada’s own hard core film about a young girl who can’t control her daily yearning to get pumped and control men with her sexual power. Whether playing hide and seek in a park, getting fucked doggy style behind the bar or daytime blow jobs – this film will turn you on. Indie, honest and moist. Based on local author Tamara Faith Berger’s naughty little book of sexual confessions.

Eyes Wide Shut
Masks and giant orgies in a mansion – ‘nuff said.

Got any other suggestions? Hit us up you sexy thang.